Why do people lose all common sense and decency the second they get behind the wheel?
There are terrible people everywhere in the world, but most of them seem to be out on the road. Every time I get in a car, I encounter at least one of these types of people, usually more, and it makes me a very unhappy individual.
Here are the 10 worst types of asshats you encounter when driving. Don’t be one of them.
1. The Drive To The Front Of The Merge Lane And Then Force His Way In Asshat
I get it. It’s really annoying to have to wait. You’re in a rush. No one else is, just you.
2. The Instant Honk Asshat
If you are in a line of 12 cars at a light and you are the 12th car and the light turns green and the split second that light turns green you are not moving so you decide to honk your horn as loud and as long as humanly possible, you sir, are an asshat.
3. The Way Too Loud Motorcycle Engine Revving Asshat
I’m guessing you’ve either got a small “member” or you just turned 50. Either way, that’s not the rest of the neighborhood’s problem.
4. The Double Parking For Way Too Long Asshat
So you just need to run in and grab your dry cleaning but you can’t find a spot close to the store? No problem, just flick on your hazards and park wherever you feel like. We understand…asshat.
5. The Needs Three Tries To Parallel Park On A Busy Street Asshat
Oh look, you hit the curb again. And now you’re pulling all the way back out. Oops. Bad angle. Let’s try that one more time.
6. The Looking For Something But Won’t Pull Over Asshat
Looking for an address but those numbers are pretty small and pretty far away so you’ll need to slow way, way down. Don’t worry, we’ll wait for you…
7. The Phone Asshat
PUT THE PHONE DOWN AND LOOK UP.
8.The Parks Across Two Spots With A Small Car Asshat
Better make sure you keep all of those losers in the parking lot as far away as possible from your pride and joy.
9. The I Need To Eat Right Now Asshat
If you think eating is important enough to drive through rush-hour traffic on a six-lane highway with your knees, I can’t believe you were ever smart enough to pass a driver’s test.
10. The Doesn’t Attempt To Turn Right During A Red Light Asshat
It’s legal and you could definitely save us all a lot of time if you just go. But no, I guess we’ll all play it safe today.